Desellation

For lack of better words, it does. I mean its bad enough I don't have ANYBODY TO TALK TO but you know thats cool I always have that problem. But you know the worst of it? When you know somebody's around. Always, the worst. I'm getting a tiny bit tired of being considerate to people, and getting shafted in return when all I want is conversation. I get it people have bad days. Fine. It happens. But they should ALWAYS remember, someone out there has had worse days. The ones who've had worse days don't wanna see you bitch and moan about your day when you refuse to accept help or advice. Ranting is sometimes needed to make people feel better. Fine

I honestly can't tell which is worse right now. My past or the present right now. All I know is that I'm tired of being second rate to everyone. Know that feel of how you try, and try constantly, only for some people to act like you don't exist? Thats about how I feel right now, and its how I felt in the past. So much for that changing, twas foolish to think it would.

So like...completely bored outta my mind. I mean sure I go job hunting in 4 days but...really I have nothing to do for those 4 days. No friends invite me places, nor do they want to come over here. Only person that tries to come over never can, and so alas I sit at this computer desk, wondering: "If I didn't have someone that cared for me, would my existence or actions have any true meaning?" ...Sadly I can answer that with a no, however thankfully I don't have to go through that. Still though, the random thoughts I have when I'm left with nothing to do, either via choice or outside interference, is astonishing. Bouncing between Yu-Gi-Oh, to